Bedtime can be a struggle and I am sure I speak for everyone when I say that no one wants to deal with a grumpy kid in the morning. There are things that we can do to prepare our kids for bedtime well before their heads touch their pillows, as well as things that we can do to make their bedroom a sleeping oasis.
How much sleep do kids even need? I have a 5-year-old and a 9-year-old so their bedtimes are different. The 5-year-old needs about 10 to 13 hours of sleep and to be out of bed by 7 AM. This means that we are putting her to bed by 8:30 PM.
Check the chart below to see how much sleep your child needs.
Group | Age | Hours Needed |
Babies | 4 months - 1 year | 12 to 16 hours |
Toddlers | 1 - 2 years | 11 to 14 hours |
Preschoolers | 3 - 5 years | 10 to 13 hours |
School-Aged | 6 - 12 years | 9 to 12 hours |
Teens | 13 - 16 years | 8 to 10 hours |
Secondly, we need to consider how much sleep our children need as an individual. My 9-year-old has always had difficulties with sleep that could be linked to her autism. She requires less sleep than others her age might need. With too much time in bed, she will lay awake playing with her fingers, and feet or rolling until she matts her hair. To decrease the playing and rolling that will stimulate her enough to keep her awake even longer, her bedtime is at 10 PM.
It must be said that it is much easier said than done when trying to get kids to bed on time. I give myself a 30-minute grace period. I find it easier to give kids more time to wind down if they need it or avoid rushing them to bed. This helps kids relax before bed rather than winding up trying to rush to bed and lying awake.
Once you know when your child needs to go to bed, the next step is creating your routine. We use visual schedules to let our kids know what happens before bedtime. The visual schedule can prevent the endless "one more" tasks that kids can create to delay going to bed. The seller TinyTotRewardCharts on Etsy is where we got ours but there are free options available for printing! Printabulls has a variety of super simple visual schedules that are free to print.
Link to Etsy listing here:
Link to Printabulls:
Part of how we use a visual calendar is to display the calm-down activities we do before bed such as taking a bath, reading books, and listening to lullabies. While we do this, we will dim the lights and turn off the TV or tablets to help our bodies get into a calmer headspace before bed.
The final key to a good night's sleep is setting the child's room up to create that sleeping oasis mentioned earlier.
Removing and limiting distractions has been so important for us. There are no toys in the kid's rooms at bedtime and we have put child locks on the closet door to prevent finding other things to play with. We have even removed the sprung door stoppers from the rooms as they had suddenly turned into toys.
Adding a white noise machine or an Alexa to play sounds throughout the night helps prevent disturbances during sleep. In my experience, it helps drown out sounds such as cars, animals, or thunder. My kids will not sleep without something playing in the background to listen to. We have also added blackout curtains to the windows to prevent light from creeping in. For my oldest girl, we have also added a bed tent to her bed to further prevent light from bothering her.
Link to an example bed tent:
She also uses a compression sleeve for her bed to give her some calming pressure while sleeping since it doesn't provide as much pressure as a weighted blanket. It also doesn't slip off in the middle of the night which helps her stay asleep. On nights when the sleeve isn't enough pressure, we swap out for a weighted blanket that matches her age/weight. For children who use compression vests or like squeezes and hugs to calm them, these can be great additions to a bedtime oasis.
Link to an example compression sleeve:
Link to an example kid's weighted blanket:
What works for each child will be different and can depend on the day. Before considering buying anything, try looking for free options. There are groups on Facebook for sharing equipment, toys, and devices that no longer meet their child's needs. In the past, I have tried things from these groups for my children that they didn't like or weren't helpful. Later I passed those items along for someone else to try.
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